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Australian exports to four countries: IELTS Task 1 answer #20, band 7.0

A student’s answer to this repeated IELTS question, shared without their name and marked by Axiom on the four criteria. Select a highlighted passage to see how it could be revised, and why.

184 words. Marked by Axiom on 30 January 2025. Estimated by AI. It isn’t an official IELTS score.

The line graph this answer describes

Australian exports to four countries (IELTS Task 1 line graph)Japan, US, China, India for 1990, 1995, 2000, 2005, 2010, 2012, in % of Australian exports. Values are approximate, read from the original chart.0102030199019952000200520102012
Australian exports to four countries (IELTS Task 1 line graph)Japan, US, China, India for 1990, 1995, 2000, 2005, 2010, 2012, in % of Australian exports. Values are approximate, read from the original chart.0102030199020002010
Values in % of Australian exports. Values approximate: read from the original chart, not printed on it.
Show the data
Australian exports to four countries (IELTS Task 1 line graph) (% of Australian exports)
JapanUSChinaIndia
1990261121
199520831
2000181151
2005188115
2010175257
2012177285

Academic Task 1184 words

The graph below shows the percentage of Australian exports to four countries from 1990 to 2012.

The line graph provides information about the percentage of Australian exits to four countries: Japan, US, China and India between 1990 and 2012. Overall, Japan and China show higher proportion of export, especially China with a sharp increase after 2000. Particularly, the percentage of export to the US and India were the lowest.

Focusing on the increases first, the percentage of exits in Japan and China showed much bigger figures compared to other categories. However, starting at around 5% in 1990, the proportion of exports in China significantly increased to a peak of 30% in 2012.

  1. Grammar & accuracy

    RevisedAfter a gradual decline by 20% in 2000, the percentage of Australian exports to Japan fluctuated at around 20% over the next twelve years.

    The revision clarifies the data and ensures accurate representation.

By contrast, the figures were smaller for the remaining categories. The percentage of exits in US fluctuated at around 15% between 1990 and 2000, after which the figure dramatically dropped to 5% over the next twelve years. The percentage of exports in India started at 0% in 1990, a figure that then rose to around 10% in 2010, but had steadily dropped by 2012.

Select a highlighted passage to see its suggested revision.

Estimated by AI. It isn’t an official IELTS score.

What Axiom wrote for each criterion: why the answer earned its band, and what to work on next.

Coherence & cohesion

Band 7.0/ 9

The essay is logically organized and presents a clear overview. The use of cohesive devices is effective, and there is a clear progression of information.

Suggestions

  • Consider using a wider range of linking words and phrases to show more variety.

Sentence revisions 3

  • RevisedThe line graph presents data on the percentage of Australian exports to four countries - Japan, US, China, and India - between 1990 and 2012.

    The revision provides a more formal and precise introduction to the topic.

  • RevisedParticularly, the percentage of exports to the US and India were the lowest.

    The revision corrects a minor grammatical error and improves the clarity of the sentence.

  • RevisedThe percentage of exports to India started at 0% in 1990, rose to around 10% in 2010, but then steadily dropped by 2012.

    The revision improves the sentence structure for better readability.

Grammar & accuracy

Band 7.0/ 9

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are few grammatical errors. Those that do exist are minor and do not impede communication.

Sentence revisions 2

  • RevisedThe percentage of exports from the US fluctuated at around 15% between 1990 and 2000.

    The term 'exits' is incorrect in this context. The correct term is 'exports'.

  • RevisedAfter a gradual decline by 20% in 2000, the percentage of Australian exports to Japan fluctuated at around 20% over the next twelve years.

    The revision clarifies the data and ensures accurate representation.

Lexical resource

Band 7.0/ 9

The essay uses a good range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic usage. The vocabulary is generally used appropriately with only minor errors.

Sentence revisions 2

  • RevisedThe line graph provides information about the percentage of Australian exports to four countries.

    The term 'exits' is incorrect in this context. The correct term is 'exports'.

  • RevisedHowever, starting at around 5% in 1990, the proportion of exports from China significantly increased to a peak of 30% in 2012.

    The revision clarifies the direction of the data and ensures accurate representation.

Task achievement

Band 7.0/ 9

The essay addresses all parts of the task and presents a clear overview of the main trends, differences or stages. The information is accurately selected and effectively compares the data.

Suggestions

  • Ensure that all data is accurately represented and clearly described.

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