Parks turned into gardens: IELTS Task 2 essay #14, band 8.0
A student’s answer to this repeated IELTS question, shared without their name and marked by Axiom on the four criteria. Select a highlighted passage to see how it could be revised, and why.
270 words. Marked by Axiom on 13 April 2026. Estimated by AI. It isn’t an official IELTS score.
Task 2270 words
In some cities, public parks and open spaces are being changed into gardens where local residents can grow their own vegetables and fruit. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
In recent years, public parks and open spaces have been transformed into community gardens where people can grow their own produce. While this shift has many advantages, they are outweighed by the disadvantages.
As it is difficult to access to fresh and affordable fruit and vegetables in many densely populated areas, allowing people to grow their own food can help reduce dependence on commercial supply chains and lower household expenses. Working towards a shared goal in a community enhances interaction among residents, particularly older ones and those living alone, by giving them the chance to have meaningful opportunities for social connection.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedThe primary advantage of converting public areas into urban gardens lies in their contribution to local food production.
The revised sentence provides a more formal and academic tone.
Grammar & accuracy
RevisedThe social role played by these urban gardening initiatives is equally significant.
The revised sentence corrects a minor grammatical error.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedHowever, the drawbacks of converting these open areas into gardens are significant.
The revised sentence provides a clearer and more direct contrast to the previous point.
Grammar & accuracy
RevisedOne of the major disadvantages of this initiative is related to the economy.
The revised sentence corrects a minor grammatical error.
Lexical resource
RevisedThe initial transformation may require a significant investment in infrastructure, including irrigation systems, tools, and fencing, which could be utilized in other areas effectively.
The revised sentence provides a more natural and precise phrasing.
Lexical resource
RevisedEqually significant are the maintenance and management challenges.
The revised sentence provides a more precise and effective word choice.
Grammar & accuracy
RevisedBecause these urban gardens are not regulated by municipal authorities, voluntary participation is crucial for their maintenance.
The revised sentence corrects a minor grammatical error and provides a more natural phrasing.
Lexical resource
RevisedA lack of interest or coordination among the volunteers can lead to conflicts among residents and reduce the overall attractiveness of the area.
The revised sentence provides a more natural and precise phrasing.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedIn conclusion, the benefits of using public areas as gardens, such as contributing to local food production and enhancing community interaction, are outweighed by the drawbacks, including high costs and management challenges.
The revised sentence provides a clearer and more concise summary of the essay's argument.
Select a highlighted passage to see its suggested revision.
What Axiom wrote for each criterion: why the answer earned its band, and what to work on next.
Coherence & cohesion
Band 8.0/ 9
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion are clearly structured. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved.
Suggestions
- Try to use a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas more effectively.
- Ensure that your conclusion effectively summarizes the key points of your essay.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedThe primary advantage of converting public areas into urban gardens lies in their contribution to local food production.
The revised sentence provides a more formal and academic tone.
RevisedHowever, the drawbacks of converting these open areas into gardens are significant.
The revised sentence provides a clearer and more direct contrast to the previous point.
RevisedIn conclusion, the benefits of using public areas as gardens, such as contributing to local food production and enhancing community interaction, are outweighed by the drawbacks, including high costs and management challenges.
The revised sentence provides a clearer and more concise summary of the essay's argument.
Grammar & accuracy
Band 8.0/ 9
The essay uses a wide range of complex structures. There are a few minor errors, but they do not impede communication.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedThe social role played by these urban gardening initiatives is equally significant.
The revised sentence corrects a minor grammatical error.
RevisedOne of the major disadvantages of this initiative is related to the economy.
The revised sentence corrects a minor grammatical error.
RevisedBecause these urban gardens are not regulated by municipal authorities, voluntary participation is crucial for their maintenance.
The revised sentence corrects a minor grammatical error and provides a more natural phrasing.
Lexical resource
Band 8.0/ 9
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedThe initial transformation may require a significant investment in infrastructure, including irrigation systems, tools, and fencing, which could be utilized in other areas effectively.
The revised sentence provides a more natural and precise phrasing.
RevisedEqually significant are the maintenance and management challenges.
The revised sentence provides a more precise and effective word choice.
RevisedA lack of interest or coordination among the volunteers can lead to conflicts among residents and reduce the overall attractiveness of the area.
The revised sentence provides a more natural and precise phrasing.
Task response
Band 8.0/ 9
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout. The arguments are well-developed and supported with relevant examples. However, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the key points and restating the position.
Suggestions
- Ensure that your conclusion effectively summarizes the key points of your essay and restates your position.
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