Changing eating habits: IELTS Task 2 essay #5, band 8.0

In recent years, people are developing a habit of unhealthy eating around the world, leading to various health issues such as obesity. The reasons for this can mainly be attributed to several factors, including affordability of unhealthy food and lack of education in food science. However, there are various strategies - such as improving accessibility to healthy food and enhancing public education - to tackle this problem.

The primary reason for changes in individuals' eating habits is the low cost of nutritionally poor food. When individuals want to purchase food, their affordable prices attract people to purchase them for daily consumption. Take fast food, for instance, it is generally less expensive compared to healthy food options, which often cost twice as much. Additionally, time constraints make fast food an attractive option for many people. This is because it can be prepared in a quick and efficient manner.

1. Coherence & cohesion

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   RevisedThe primary reason for the shift in individuals' eating habits is the low cost of nutritionally poor food.

   The word 'changes' could be more specifically replaced with 'shift' to better indicate the change in eating habits.

Another significant factor related to this is nutritional illiteracy in people's eating lifestyle. A growing number of individuals are unaware of the correct intake levels for calories, proteins, and carbohydrates in products. For example, I had a friend who did not have enough information about nutrition and junk food constituted the primary component of her diet. Consequently, she was diagnosed with a gastric disease.

1. Coherence & cohesion

   Close revision note

   RevisedAnother significant factor contributing to this is the lack of knowledge in people's eating habits.

   The phrase 'nutritional illiteracy in people's eating lifestyle' is a bit unclear and could be more effectively expressed as 'lack of knowledge in people's eating habits'.

To improve people's eating habits, one effective solution is increasing the number of affordable healthy options. The government should establish more healthy food restaurants and cafes as alternatemives to fast food chains. Furthermore, financial support - such as tax reductions and low interest loans - should be offered to manufacturers of nutritious foods and companies that promote healthy eating.

1. Coherence & cohesion

   Close revision note

   RevisedTo improve people's eating habits, an effective solution could be increasing the number of affordable healthy options.

   The use of 'one effective solution is increasing' is a bit rigid and could be more flexibly expressed as 'an effective solution could be increasing'.

Another important solution is to raise awareness about healthy eating. This can be achieved by implementing educational campaigns and teaching food science subjects at school to inform the public and generations about healthy food options and proper nutritional intake. Such activities can help foster healthy eating habits.

In conclusion, the preference for unhealthy eating over healthy food can be attributed to factors such as the high cost of nutritious food and lack of food literacy. However, this issue can be addressed by developing healthy food options and improving awareness of healthy products.