Shakefield town, 1995 and now: IELTS Task 1 answer #29, band 6.0

A student’s answer to this repeated IELTS question, shared without their name and marked by Axiom on the four criteria. Select a highlighted passage to see how it could be revised, and why.

234 words. Marked by Axiom on 20 January 2026. Estimated by AI. It isn’t an official IELTS score.

The map this answer describes

Shakefield town, 1995 and now: what the maps show

1995

The central area above the main road is dominated by a Public park and a small Hotel.
The right-hand area above the road has Farm land in the top-right corner.
The coastal/marine area at the bottom left features a Fish market and Morning fish boat.

Present

The Public park was replaced by Holiday homes and a Car park.
The Farm land in the top right was replaced by a Golf Course and a Tennis Course.
The fishing facilities (Fish market and Morning fish boat) were replaced by Apartments and leisure Yachts in the sea.
The Sport area was replaced by a Restaurant, while Housing expanded.
The Hotel expanded in size, and the Coffee shop remained unchanged.

New by Present: Restaurant, Apartment, Holiday homes, Car park, Golf Course, Tennis Course, Yacht
Gone by Present: Sport, Fish market, Morning fish boat, Public park, Farm land

Academic Task 1234 words

The diagram below shows the changes of the town named Shakefield from 1995 until now.

The given maps compare the transformation of a town called Shakefield from 1995 until now. Overall, the place has undergone a significant shift, becoming more modern with the introduction of a restaurant, holiday homes, an apartment, a golf and tennis course. However, this came at the expense of a public park, sport, farmland and fish market.

Lexical resource
Close revision note
RevisedThe maps illustrate the transformation of Shakefield from 1995 to the present.
'Illustrate' is a more precise verb for describing maps.
Lexical resource
Close revision note
RevisedOverall, the town has modernized significantly with the addition of a restaurant, holiday homes, an apartment, and a golf and tennis course.
'Modernized' is a more concise way to express the idea.

In 1995, there was a housing at the top left corner. While the hotel occupied the central area, the sport was located to the west, and the public park was positioned directly opposite. At the top right corner, the farm land was situated. The coffee stood below the hotel, with a fish market situated, and beneath which were the morning fish beat and the sea.

Coherence & cohesion
Close revision note
RevisedIn 1995, housing was located in the top left corner of the map.
The sentence structure was awkward and needed clarification.
Grammar & accuracy
Close revision note
RevisedWhile the hotel occupied the central area, the sports facility was located to the west, and the public park was directly opposite.
'Sport' should be 'sports facility' for grammatical accuracy.
Coherence & cohesion
Close revision note
RevisedThe coffee shop was located below the hotel, with a fish market nearby, and beneath them were the morning fish boats and the sea.
The sentence was fragmented and needed restructuring for clarity.

Since then, some of the original facilities have remained intact, namely the coffee and sea, other areas have experienced significant changes. The farm land has gone and its place are now a new the golf and tennis course. The sport near the hotel, for example, has been replaced by a new restaurant. The apartment has been introduced, occupying where the fish market used to be. Although housing and hotel have been reshaped, the morning fish boat were removed and a new yacht has been added near the sea. A car park, additionally, has been constructed. A final alternation are the introduction of holiday homes, which now occupied previously used for the public park.

Grammar & accuracy
Close revision note
RevisedSince then, some original facilities, such as the coffee shop and the sea, have remained intact, while other areas have experienced significant changes.
The sentence needed restructuring for clarity and grammatical accuracy.
Grammar & accuracy
Close revision note
RevisedAlthough the housing and hotel have been reshaped, the morning fish boats were removed, and a new yacht has been added near the sea.
Subject-verb agreement needed correction.
Coherence & cohesion
Close revision note
RevisedFinally, holiday homes have been introduced, occupying the area previously used for the public park.
The sentence was grammatically incorrect and needed rephrasing.

Select a highlighted passage to see its suggested revision.

Estimated by AI. It isn’t an official IELTS score.

What Axiom wrote for each criterion: why the answer earned its band, and what to work on next.

Coherence & cohesion

Band 6.0/ 9

The essay presents information in a logical order, but transitions between ideas could be smoother. Some sentences are fragmented or awkwardly structured, which affects the flow.

Suggestions

Use more linking words to improve flow.
Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea.
Avoid abrupt transitions between ideas.

Sentence revisions 3

RevisedIn 1995, housing was located in the top left corner of the map.
The sentence structure was awkward and needed clarification.
RevisedThe coffee shop was located below the hotel, with a fish market nearby, and beneath them were the morning fish boats and the sea.
The sentence was fragmented and needed restructuring for clarity.
RevisedFinally, holiday homes have been introduced, occupying the area previously used for the public park.
The sentence was grammatically incorrect and needed rephrasing.

Grammar & accuracy

Band 5.0/ 9

The essay contains several grammatical errors, including incorrect verb forms and sentence fragments. These issues affect readability and clarity.

Sentence revisions 3

RevisedWhile the hotel occupied the central area, the sports facility was located to the west, and the public park was directly opposite.
'Sport' should be 'sports facility' for grammatical accuracy.
RevisedSince then, some original facilities, such as the coffee shop and the sea, have remained intact, while other areas have experienced significant changes.
The sentence needed restructuring for clarity and grammatical accuracy.
RevisedAlthough the housing and hotel have been reshaped, the morning fish boats were removed, and a new yacht has been added near the sea.
Subject-verb agreement needed correction.

Lexical resource

Band 6.0/ 9

The vocabulary used is adequate but lacks variety. Some word choices are incorrect or awkward, affecting clarity.

Sentence revisions 3

RevisedThe maps illustrate the transformation of Shakefield from 1995 to the present.
'Illustrate' is a more precise verb for describing maps.
RevisedOverall, the town has modernized significantly with the addition of a restaurant, holiday homes, an apartment, and a golf and tennis course.
'Modernized' is a more concise way to express the idea.
RevisedFinally, holiday homes have been introduced, occupying the area previously used for the public park.
'Alternation' is incorrect; 'introduction' or 'addition' is more appropriate.

Task achievement

Band 7.0/ 9

The essay addresses the task and describes the main changes in Shakefield. However, some details are inaccurately described or omitted.

Suggestions

Ensure all changes are accurately described.
Include more specific details from the map.
Avoid omitting key features.

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