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Visitors to three areas: IELTS Task 1 answer #41, band 7.5

A student’s answer to this repeated IELTS question, shared without their name and marked by Axiom on the four criteria. Select a highlighted passage to see how it could be revised, and why.

162 words. Marked by Axiom on 7 August 2025. Estimated by AI. It isn’t an official IELTS score.

The line graph this answer describes

Visitors to three areas (IELTS Task 1 line graph)The coast, The mountains, The lakes for 1987, 1992, 1997, 2002, 2007, in thousand visitors. Values are approximate, read from the original chart.02040608019871992199720022007
Visitors to three areas (IELTS Task 1 line graph)The coast, The mountains, The lakes for 1987, 1992, 1997, 2002, 2007, in thousand visitors. Values are approximate, read from the original chart.02040608019871992199720022007
Values in thousand visitors. Values approximate: read from the original chart, not printed on it.
Show the data
Visitors to three areas (IELTS Task 1 line graph) (thousand visitors)
The coastThe mountainsThe lakes
1987402010
1992352525
1997483040
2002623175
2007753550

Academic Task 1162 words

The graph below shows the number of overseas visitors to three different areas in a European country between 1987 and 2007.

  1. Lexical resource

    RevisedThe graph depicts the number of overseas visitors to three distinct areas in a European country from 1987 to 2007.

    Replaced 'illustrates' with 'depicts' and 'places' with 'areas' for more precise vocabulary.

  2. Lexical resource

    RevisedThese areas include the coast, mountains, and lake.

    Removed 'kinds of' for conciseness and clarity.

  1. Coherence & cohesion

    RevisedOverall, while visitors to the coast and lake experienced a significant rise, the mountains saw only a slight increase.

    Added 'while' to improve the transition between ideas.

  2. Grammar & accuracy

    RevisedNotably, the mountains were the least popular destination for travelers throughout most of the period.

    Rephrased for clarity and grammatical accuracy.

  1. Coherence & cohesion

    RevisedIn more detail, the coast was the most popular area throughout the period.

    Added 'more' to enhance the transition.

  2. Grammar & accuracy

    RevisedDespite a dip in the first five years from 40 thousand to approximately 31 thousand, the number of visitors to the coast recovered to 70 thousand in the following years.

    Changed 'campers' to 'visitors' for accuracy and '5' to 'five' for consistency.

Starting at roughly 11 thousand, it grew dramatically to above 70 thousand by 2002, before falling to about 51 thousand by the final year.

  1. Coherence & cohesion

    RevisedRegarding the lake, it exhibited an upward trend throughout the period.

    Changed 'As for' to 'Regarding' for better coherence.

  2. Grammar & accuracy

    RevisedIn contrast, tourists to the mountains started at 20 thousand, a figure that then rose slowly to 30 thousand over the period.

    Replaced 'began' with 'started' and 'which' with 'that' for grammatical accuracy.

Select a highlighted passage to see its suggested revision.

Estimated by AI. It isn’t an official IELTS score.

What Axiom wrote for each criterion: why the answer earned its band, and what to work on next.

Coherence & cohesion

Band 7.0/ 9

The essay is well-organized with a clear structure. There is a logical progression of ideas, but some transitions could be smoother.

Suggestions

  • Use more linking words to enhance flow.
  • Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea.
  • Avoid abrupt shifts in topics.

Sentence revisions 3

  • RevisedOverall, while visitors to the coast and lake experienced a significant rise, the mountains saw only a slight increase.

    Added 'while' to improve the transition between ideas.

  • RevisedIn more detail, the coast was the most popular area throughout the period.

    Added 'more' to enhance the transition.

  • RevisedRegarding the lake, it exhibited an upward trend throughout the period.

    Changed 'As for' to 'Regarding' for better coherence.

Grammar & accuracy

Band 8.0/ 9

The essay demonstrates a good range of grammatical structures with minor errors.

Sentence revisions 3

  • RevisedDespite a dip in the first five years from 40 thousand to approximately 31 thousand, the number of visitors to the coast recovered to 70 thousand in the following years.

    Changed 'campers' to 'visitors' for accuracy and '5' to 'five' for consistency.

  • RevisedIn contrast, tourists to the mountains started at 20 thousand, a figure that then rose slowly to 30 thousand over the period.

    Replaced 'began' with 'started' and 'which' with 'that' for grammatical accuracy.

  • RevisedNotably, the mountains were the least popular destination for travelers throughout most of the period.

    Rephrased for clarity and grammatical accuracy.

Lexical resource

Band 7.0/ 9

The essay uses a good range of vocabulary with some precision. There are occasional lapses in word choice.

Sentence revisions 3

  • RevisedThe graph depicts the number of overseas visitors to three distinct areas in a European country from 1987 to 2007.

    Replaced 'illustrates' with 'depicts' and 'places' with 'areas' for more precise vocabulary.

  • RevisedThese areas include the coast, mountains, and lake.

    Removed 'kinds of' for conciseness and clarity.

  • RevisedStarting at approximately 11 thousand, it surged dramatically to over 70 thousand by 2002.

    Replaced 'roughly' with 'approximately' and 'grew' with 'surged' for more precise language.

Task achievement

Band 8.0/ 9

The essay addresses the task effectively, covering all key features of the graph.

Suggestions

  • Include more specific data points for clarity.
  • Ensure all trends are clearly highlighted.

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