Team activities and life skills: IELTS Task 2 essay #21, band 7.0

It is argued that group works or team engaging activities can teach life skills that are more crucial for the person’s future than the activities done on the person’s own do. While I acknowledge that self activities might form greater discipline or problem-solving skills, I believe that it cannot outweigh the advantages of teamworking.

One of the most prominent skills to have in life is networking skills. If someone has excellent networking skills, it is plausible that he will succeed in his life as he can talk to successful people freely, getting a lot of suggestions, insights, or help from them. In that case, teamworking or group activities play an essential role in forming good networking skills. When you do something in a group, you develop your communication skill, the backbone of a networking specialist, directly or indirectly. You cannot do that if you only work alone, and once you go outside and try to talk to people, get their opinions or recommendations, you struggle as you have probably become an introvert by spending your time alone a lot. I think it is very bad because we live in a world where networking is necessary to survive and thrive.

1. Lexical resource

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   RevisedPossessing excellent networking skills is likely to contribute significantly to one's success, as it enables effective communication with successful individuals, garnering valuable suggestions, insights, and assistance.

   The revised sentence is more formal and precise, and it also improves the flow of the sentence.

2. Coherence & cohesion

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   RevisedIn this instance, teamworking or group activities play an essential role in fostering networking skills.

   The revised sentence provides a more direct and clear connection between the two ideas.

Moreover, another very useful skill to have in life is leadership. Leadership skills are necessary especially if you want to be a leader or a successful person, or if you want people to listen to you, or if you want people to follow you. These are the desires every human being wants and the way to form them is by teamworking. When doing teamwork, you give your own ideas, or if someone’s idea is bad, you say that it is bad and needs to be refined. These are the basic traits of a leader, and you can have a chance to feel them and make them even better. For instance, I know someone who is close to me, and he actively takes part in team activities. His leadership skills are amazing, and I will not be surprised if he becomes a prime minister or something close like that.

1. Grammar & accuracy

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   RevisedFurthermore, leadership is another invaluable skill for life.

   The revised sentence is more formal and precise, and it also improves the flow of the sentence.

2. Grammar & accuracy

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   RevisedIn a teamwork setting, you can express your own ideas, and if someone else's idea is deemed poor, you can suggest that it needs refinement.

   The revised sentence is more formal and precise, and it also improves the flow of the sentence.

3. Coherence & cohesion

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   RevisedThese traits are fundamental for leadership, and engaging in team activities provides an opportunity to cultivate and enhance them.

   The revised sentence provides a clearer and more direct connection between the two ideas.

In conclusion, I agree with the idea that group activities can teach more crucial life skills than the skills that self activities can form, which are networking and leadership skills.

1. Lexical resource

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   RevisedI concur with the notion that group activities are more effective in imparting essential life skills, such as networking and leadership, compared to individual activities.

   The revised sentence is more formal and precise, and it also improves the flow of the sentence.