axiom

University library, 2005 and today: IELTS Task 1 answer #5, band 6.0

A student’s answer to this repeated IELTS question, shared without their name and marked by Axiom on the four criteria. Select a highlighted passage to see how it could be revised, and why.

157 words. Marked by Axiom on 22 December 2024. Estimated by AI. It isn’t an official IELTS score.

The plan this answer describes

University library, 2005 and today: what the plans show

University library, 2005

  • The layout combines bookshelves, large study tables, borrowing/returns, computer desks and an office.

University library, today

  • Private study desks replace the earlier central arrangement.
  • Automated borrowing is shown on the left and student-laptop desks are shown on the right and bottom.
Gone by University library, today
Library office

Academic Task 1157 words

The map show a university library in 2005 and the same library today.

The maps show the main changes that have taken place in a university library since 2005.

Overall, significant developments of the university library have included the addition of an automated book borrowing and private study desks.

  1. Coherence & cohesion

    RevisedThe previous library office has been removed to accommodate desks for student laptops.

    Simplifies and clarifies the change.

There used to be desks with computers on the mid-right, with the library office located below.

  1. Grammar & accuracy

    RevisedIn 2005, the university library featured three bookshelves on each side of the study tables.

    Enhances grammatical precision by using a more accurate preposition.

  2. Grammar & accuracy

    RevisedNext to the study tables was the book borrowing and returns section.

    Improves grammatical accuracy and clarity.

currently, the amenities have been rearranged. Both study tables and book borrowing and returns are removed and replaced by a private study desk at the center.

  1. Coherence & cohesion

    RevisedDesks for student laptops now replace the bookshelves, library office, and computer desks. Additionally, a large automated book-borrowing machine has been installed to the left of the study desks.

    Breaks down complex information into simpler, clearer sentences.

Select a highlighted passage to see its suggested revision.

Estimated by AI. It isn’t an official IELTS score.

What Axiom wrote for each criterion: why the answer earned its band, and what to work on next.

Coherence & cohesion

Band 6.0/ 9

The essay presents information in a logical manner, but there are some issues with clarity and organization.

Suggestions

  • Use clearer transitions between ideas.
  • Ensure all changes are clearly described.
  • Avoid abrupt shifts in topic.

Sentence revisions 3

  • RevisedIn the present layout, the amenities have been rearranged to enhance functionality.

    Clarifies the reason behind the rearrangement.

  • RevisedThe previous library office has been removed to accommodate desks for student laptops.

    Simplifies and clarifies the change.

  • RevisedDesks for student laptops now replace the bookshelves, library office, and computer desks. Additionally, a large automated book-borrowing machine has been installed to the left of the study desks.

    Breaks down complex information into simpler, clearer sentences.

Grammar & accuracy

Band 6.0/ 9

The essay demonstrates a basic range of grammatical structures with some errors.

Sentence revisions 3

  • RevisedIt is also evident that the previous library office has been demolished to make space for student laptop desks.

    Corrects grammatical errors and improves clarity.

  • RevisedNext to the study tables was the book borrowing and returns section.

    Improves grammatical accuracy and clarity.

  • RevisedIn 2005, the university library featured three bookshelves on each side of the study tables.

    Enhances grammatical precision by using a more accurate preposition.

Lexical resource

Band 6.0/ 9

The essay uses a limited range of vocabulary with some repetition.

Sentence revisions 3

  • RevisedMajor changes in the university library include the installation of automated book borrowing systems and private study desks.

    Uses more precise vocabulary.

  • RevisedThe former library office has been removed to create space for laptop desks for students.

    Avoids repetition and uses more varied vocabulary.

  • RevisedAt present, the facilities have been reorganized.

    Uses synonyms to enhance lexical variety.

Task achievement

Band 6.0/ 9

The essay addresses the task but lacks detailed explanations and comparisons.

Suggestions

  • Include more detailed comparisons between the two time periods.
  • Provide specific examples of changes.
  • Ensure all major changes are covered.

Check your own answer on this question

Write your answer and Axiom marks it the same way: a band for each criterion, and revisions for your own sentences. How the Task 1 checker works.

Check an essay free