Visitors to three areas: IELTS Task 1 answer #48, band 7.0
A student’s answer to this repeated IELTS question, shared without their name and marked by Axiom on the four criteria. Select a highlighted passage to see how it could be revised, and why.
200 words. Marked by Axiom on 2 July 2026. Estimated by AI. It isn’t an official IELTS score.
The line graph this answer describes
Show the data
| The coast | The mountains | The lakes | |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1987 | 40 | 20 | 10 |
| 1992 | 35 | 25 | 25 |
| 1997 | 48 | 30 | 40 |
| 2002 | 62 | 31 | 75 |
| 2007 | 75 | 35 | 50 |
Academic Task 1200 words
The graph below shows the number of overseas visitors to three different areas of a European country between 1987 and 2007.
The line graph compares changes in the number of foreign visitors to three visitor destinations of a European country from 1987 to 2007.
Grammar & accuracy
RevisedAll figures are given in thousands.
Improves formality and clarity.
Overall, the number of tourists to all areas increased over time, albeit to varying degrees.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedIt is also clear that the mountains consistently attracted the fewest visitors, whereas both the coast and the lakes saw significantly higher numbers, particularly in the later years.
Clarifies the comparison and makes the relationship between the areas more explicit.
In 1987, the number of visitors to the coast was well below 40, the highest figure in the chart in that year.
Grammar & accuracy
RevisedAfter decreasing to about 32,000 in 1992, the number of visitors to the coast increased sharply to 70,000 by 2007.
Clarifies the subject and improves sentence structure.
The number of visitors to the lakes also increased markedly over the period. This figure started off at 10 and, growing slowly to nearly 35 in 1997, reached a high of about 75 in 2002 after rising dramatically.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedHowever, this figure declined to approximately 50,000 by 2007.
Corrects the value to more closely match the graph and maintains consistency in units.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedIn contrast, the number of visitors to the mountains showed only a modest increase, starting at around 20,000 in 1987.
Improves clarity and accuracy of the data presented.
Grammar & accuracy
RevisedThis number rose to about 28,000 in 1997, experienced a slight dip to 27,000 in 2002, and then peaked at 30,000 in 2007.
Corrects the sequence of changes and improves clarity.
Select a highlighted passage to see its suggested revision.
What Axiom wrote for each criterion: why the answer earned its band, and what to work on next.
Coherence & cohesion
Band 7.0/ 9
The essay is logically organized, with clear paragraphs and a logical progression of ideas. There is a clear overview and appropriate grouping of information. However, some comparisons could be made more explicit, and transitions between points could be smoother.
Suggestions
- Use more linking words to improve flow between sentences.
- Make explicit comparisons between the three areas in each time period.
- Clarify the sequence of changes for each area.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedIt is also clear that the mountains consistently attracted the fewest visitors, whereas both the coast and the lakes saw significantly higher numbers, particularly in the later years.
Clarifies the comparison and makes the relationship between the areas more explicit.
RevisedIn contrast, the number of visitors to the mountains showed only a modest increase, starting at around 20,000 in 1987.
Improves clarity and accuracy of the data presented.
RevisedHowever, this figure declined to approximately 50,000 by 2007.
Corrects the value to more closely match the graph and maintains consistency in units.
Grammar & accuracy
Band 7.0/ 9
The essay demonstrates a good range of grammatical structures with generally accurate usage. There are minor errors and awkward constructions, but they do not impede understanding.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedAfter decreasing to about 32,000 in 1992, the number of visitors to the coast increased sharply to 70,000 by 2007.
Clarifies the subject and improves sentence structure.
RevisedThis number rose to about 28,000 in 1997, experienced a slight dip to 27,000 in 2002, and then peaked at 30,000 in 2007.
Corrects the sequence of changes and improves clarity.
RevisedAll figures are given in thousands.
Improves formality and clarity.
Lexical resource
Band 7.0/ 9
The vocabulary is generally appropriate and varied, with some effective use of academic language. However, there are occasional awkward phrases and minor inaccuracies in word choice.
Sentence revisions 3
Revisedrose sharply to 70,000 in 2007
Provides more precise and formal language.
Revisedthis figure began at 10,000
Clarifies the unit and uses more formal language.
Revisedexperienced a decline
'Experienced' is a more natural collocation with 'decline' in academic writing.
Task achievement
Band 7.0/ 9
The main trends and comparisons are clearly summarized, and the essay covers the key features of the graph. Some data points are slightly inaccurate, and more precise comparisons could be made.
Suggestions
- Double-check data values for accuracy.
- Include more direct comparisons between the three areas at key points in time.
- Ensure all figures are clearly stated in thousands.
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