Negative news in the media: IELTS Task 2 essay #4, band 8.0
A student’s answer to this repeated IELTS question, shared without their name and marked by Axiom on the four criteria. Select a highlighted passage to see how it could be revised, and why.
374 words. Marked by Axiom on 18 February 2025. Estimated by AI. It isn’t an official IELTS score.
Task 2374 words
The tendency for news reports in the media to focus on problems and emergencies rather than on positive developments is harmful to the individual and to society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement
While this concern is understandable due to the potential psychological and societal effects, I believe the perceived harm of such media coverage is sometimes overstated.
Lexical resource
RevisedThe media is often criticized for giving undue attention to negative developments such as crime, natural disasters, and terrorist attacks.
The revised sentence is more precise and conveys the intended meaning more clearly.
Excessive exposure to negative news can undoubtedly have adverse effects on people’s psychological well-being. For instance, during the COVID-19 pandemic, the global panic demonstrated how people are highly susceptible to fear-inducing reports, even when they originate from unreliable sources. Such overexposure can lead to heightened stress, increased pessimism, and even public hysteria.
Grammar & accuracy
RevisedThe media plays a crucial role in shaping public perceptions, and when individuals are consistently bombarded with distressing news, it can create widespread anxiety and a distorted sense of reality.
The revised sentence is more accurate and uses the correct article.
Firstly, this pattern of sensationalizing negative events has been prevalent for decades, leading many individuals to develop a level of awareness and skepticism toward media tactics. This suggests that the issue is not solely rooted in media manipulation but also in human psychology.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedHowever, I believe that the concerns about media's focus on negative news are sometimes overstated.
The revised sentence is simpler and more direct, which can improve the clarity of the argument.
Lexical resource
RevisedPeople today are more critical of news sources, understanding that sensational headlines are often designed to attract attention rather than reflect reality.
The revised sentence is more accurate and uses more appropriate vocabulary.
Grammar & accuracy
RevisedMoreover, research has shown that audiences are naturally drawn to negative news, which provides an incentive for media outlets to prioritize such content.
The revised sentence is more accurate and uses the correct verb form.
The widespread availability of smartphones and personalized news applications allows users to selectively engage with content that aligns with their interests.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedFurthermore, the rise of digital technology has given individuals more control over their news consumption.
The revised sentence is more concise and easier to understand, which can improve the flow of ideas.
Lexical resource
RevisedMany platforms now offer features that allow people to follow reputable sources, filter out distressing content, and focus on constructive or solution-based journalism.
The revised sentence is more concise and uses more appropriate vocabulary.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedThis level of control can significantly reduce the potential for media-induced anxiety, which challenges the assumption that negative news has an unavoidable impact on public well-being.
The revised sentence provides a clearer connection between the two ideas, improving the flow of the argument.
In conclusion, while the media’s emphasis on negative news can contribute to anxiety and distorted perceptions, the extent of its harmful effects is often overstated. Therefore, rather than blaming the media entirely, a more balanced approach would be to encourage critical thinking and responsible news consumption.
Grammar & accuracy
RevisedAs media literacy increases and individuals gain greater control over the information they consume, the influence of negative news is diminished.
The revised sentence is more accurate and uses the correct verb form.
Select a highlighted passage to see its suggested revision.
What Axiom wrote for each criterion: why the answer earned its band, and what to work on next.
Coherence & cohesion
Band 8.0/ 9
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The introduction and conclusion are clear and relevant. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved.
Suggestions
- Try to use a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas.
- Ensure that your arguments are presented in a clear and logical order.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedHowever, I believe that the concerns about media's focus on negative news are sometimes overstated.
The revised sentence is simpler and more direct, which can improve the clarity of the argument.
RevisedFurthermore, the rise of digital technology has given individuals more control over their news consumption.
The revised sentence is more concise and easier to understand, which can improve the flow of ideas.
RevisedThis level of control can significantly reduce the potential for media-induced anxiety, which challenges the assumption that negative news has an unavoidable impact on public well-being.
The revised sentence provides a clearer connection between the two ideas, improving the flow of the argument.
Grammar & accuracy
Band 8.0/ 9
The essay uses a wide range of complex structures. There are a few minor errors, but they do not impede communication.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedThe media plays a crucial role in shaping public perceptions, and when individuals are consistently bombarded with distressing news, it can create widespread anxiety and a distorted sense of reality.
The revised sentence is more accurate and uses the correct article.
RevisedMoreover, research has shown that audiences are naturally drawn to negative news, which provides an incentive for media outlets to prioritize such content.
The revised sentence is more accurate and uses the correct verb form.
RevisedAs media literacy increases and individuals gain greater control over the information they consume, the influence of negative news is diminished.
The revised sentence is more accurate and uses the correct verb form.
Lexical resource
Band 8.0/ 9
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedThe media is often criticized for giving undue attention to negative developments such as crime, natural disasters, and terrorist attacks.
The revised sentence is more precise and conveys the intended meaning more clearly.
RevisedPeople today are more critical of news sources, understanding that sensational headlines are often designed to attract attention rather than reflect reality.
The revised sentence is more accurate and uses more appropriate vocabulary.
RevisedMany platforms now offer features that allow people to follow reputable sources, filter out distressing content, and focus on constructive or solution-based journalism.
The revised sentence is more concise and uses more appropriate vocabulary.
Task response
Band 9.0/ 9
The essay addresses the task fully, presenting a clear position throughout the response. The essay provides relevant, extended and supported ideas.
Check your own essay on this question
Write your answer and Axiom marks it the same way: a band for each criterion, and revisions for your own sentences. How the Task 2 checker works.
Check an essay free