Participation in four sports: IELTS Task 1 answer #11, band 4.5
A student’s answer to this repeated IELTS question, shared without their name and marked by Axiom on the four criteria. Select a highlighted passage to see how it could be revised, and why.
151 words. Marked by Axiom on 23 May 2026. Estimated by AI. It isn’t an official IELTS score.
The line graph this answer describes
Show the data
| Basketball | Tennis | Badminton | Rugby | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1985 | 80 | 150 | 55 | 240 |
| 1990 | 78 | 175 | 45 | 210 |
| 1995 | 82 | 200 | 50 | 200 |
| 2000 | 83 | 210 | 50 | 150 |
| 2005 | 80 | 220 | 50 | 50 |
Academic Task 1151 words
The graph below shows the number of people taking part in four different kinds of sports in a particular region between 1985 and 2005. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.
The line graph provides data about individuals taking part in four different kinds
of sports - basketball, tennis, badminton and rugby - in a specific region between
1985 and 2005. Overall, it is evident that rugby seen decline throughout the
period, while tennis earning popularity among individuals. Additionally, basketball
and badminton witnessed little changes throuhout the period, basketball
preferred by more people than badminton.
Firstly, rugby started period with approximately 240 members in 1985, showing a
peak result, before falling gradually untill reaching 50 members in 2005. In
contrast, tennis, starting with 150 subscriptions in 1985, seen significant shift
throughout the period, reaching their peak in 2005 by approximately 230
individuals on their sports team. Moreover, members of both basketball and
tennis equalized to each other in 1995 by 200 members.
Lastly, basketball and badminton, seen no changes in the given period, by
number of members approximately 75 and 50 respectively.
No passages are highlighted in this essay.
What Axiom wrote for each criterion: why the answer earned its band, and what to work on next.
Coherence & cohesion
Band 5.0/ 9
The essay presents information in a generally logical order, but there are issues with paragraphing and linking devices. Some sentences are not clearly connected, and transitions between ideas are abrupt. The summary and comparisons are present but could be more clearly structured.
Suggestions
- Use clear topic sentences for each paragraph.
- Improve transitions between sentences and ideas.
- Group similar information together for better flow.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedOverall, it is evident that rugby experienced a decline throughout the period, while tennis gained popularity among individuals.
Improved sentence structure and verb tense for clarity and cohesion.
RevisedAdditionally, basketball and badminton witnessed little change throughout the period, with basketball being preferred by more people than badminton.
Clarified the comparison and corrected grammar for better flow.
RevisedLastly, the number of participants in basketball and badminton remained relatively stable during the period, at approximately 75 and 50 members respectively.
Combined information for cohesion and improved sentence structure.
Grammar & accuracy
Band 4.0/ 9
There are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and sentence structure. These mistakes sometimes make the meaning unclear.
Sentence revisions 3
Revisedrugby saw a decline throughout the period, while tennis gained popularity among individuals.
Corrected verb tense and agreement.
Revisedwhich peaked at the start, before gradually falling until it reached 50 members in 2005.
Corrected sentence structure and spelling.
RevisedTennis, which started with 150 participants in 1985, saw a significant increase throughout the period, reaching a peak of approximately 230 participants in 2005.
Corrected verb tense, subject, and sentence structure.
Lexical resource
Band 5.0/ 9
The vocabulary is somewhat varied but there are frequent errors in word choice and form. Some phrases are awkward or incorrect, which affects clarity.
Sentence revisions 3
Revisedrugby saw a decline throughout the period, while tennis gained popularity among participants.
Corrected verb forms and used more appropriate vocabulary.
Revisedreaching a peak at the beginning, before gradually falling to 50 members in 2005.
Used more natural phrasing and corrected spelling.
Revisedtennis, which started with 150 participants in 1985, saw a significant increase throughout the period, peaking at approximately 230 participants in 2005.
Improved vocabulary and phrasing for accuracy and clarity.
Task achievement
Band 5.0/ 9
The essay addresses the main trends and comparisons, but some details are inaccurate or unclear. The summary of main features is present, but there are errors in reporting specific data and some information is missing or misrepresented.
Suggestions
- Report specific figures accurately from the graph.
- Include all four sports in the summary and comparisons.
- Avoid generalizations and ensure all information is supported by the data.
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