Average house prices: IELTS Task 1 answer #3, band 5.5

A student’s answer to this repeated IELTS question, shared without their name and marked by Axiom on the four criteria. Select a highlighted passage to see how it could be revised, and why.

188 words. Marked by Axiom on 5 November 2024. Estimated by AI. It isn’t an official IELTS score.

The line graph this answer describes

Values in thousand dollars. Values approximate: read from the original chart, not printed on it.

Show the data

Average house prices (IELTS Task 1 line graph) (thousand dollars)
	Country A	Country B	Country C
1997	150	125	100
1998	175	200	125
1999	200	225	125
2000	200	250	150
2001	300	275	150
2002	400	300	150
2003	550	300	175
2004	500	325	175
2005	475	375	200
2006	450	300	200
2007	500	275	225
2008	550	275	150
2009	600	375	250
2010	600	475	275
2011	600	500	275
2012	625	525	300
2013	600	500	300
2014	625	500	275

Academic Task 1188 words

The graph below shows the average house prices in 3 countries between the years 1997-2014

The line graph provided illustrates moderate price for the house in three different countries room 1997 to 2004

It is clear that, each line has increased over the period. Overall, country C had the least expensive housing while country A had more expensive house cost compared to others.

Coherence & cohesion
Close revision note
RevisedIt is clear that each country's house prices increased over the period.
Removed the comma for better flow and clarity.
Grammar & accuracy
Close revision note
RevisedOverall, country C had the least expensive housing, while country A had the most expensive house prices compared to the others.
Added a comma for clarity and corrected the comparative structure.

in 1997, all lines stood at the relatively the same cost for accommodation, with about 125k dollars. The figure for country A was dominant at the starting point. However, it started losing positions to the country B but in 2000, it rocketed to about 520K dollars. Consequently, it experienced a small dip by about 40k dollars before gradually increasing to reach its highest point at the end of the period which is approximately $600k.

Lexical resource
Close revision note
RevisedCountry A had the highest starting price.
Simplified the expression for clarity.
Grammar & accuracy
Close revision note
RevisedConsequently, it experienced a small dip of about $40k before gradually increasing to its highest point at approximately $600k by the end of the period.
Improved sentence structure and clarity.

The figures for countries B and C gradually increased during the period. Latter reached a plateau which lasted from 1997 to 2013. However, there was a small in the last year. Line for country B had more fluctuated pattern. First, it increased gradually till 2005 before declining till 2008. Consequently, it witnessed a dramatic increase to $500k where it stabilized till the end of the period.

Coherence & cohesion
Close revision note
RevisedCountry C reached a plateau from 2005 to 2013.
Corrected the time period and made the subject clear.
Coherence & cohesion
Close revision note
RevisedHowever, there was a small decline in the last year.
Added 'decline' for clarity.
Lexical resource
Close revision note
RevisedThe line for country B showed a more fluctuating pattern.
Improved word choice and grammatical structure.
Grammar & accuracy
Close revision note
RevisedFirst, it increased gradually until 2005 before declining until 2008.
Replaced 'till' with 'until' for formality.

Select a highlighted passage to see its suggested revision.

Estimated by AI. It isn’t an official IELTS score.

What Axiom wrote for each criterion: why the answer earned its band, and what to work on next.

Coherence & cohesion

Band 6.0/ 9

The essay follows a logical sequence, but there are some inconsistencies and unclear transitions.

Suggestions

Improve transitions between ideas.
Clarify the description of trends for each country.

Sentence revisions 3

RevisedIt is clear that each country's house prices increased over the period.
Removed the comma for better flow and clarity.
RevisedCountry C reached a plateau from 2005 to 2013.
Corrected the time period and made the subject clear.
RevisedHowever, there was a small decline in the last year.
Added 'decline' for clarity.

Grammar & accuracy

Band 5.0/ 9

There are several grammatical errors that affect clarity.

Sentence revisions 3

RevisedOverall, country C had the least expensive housing, while country A had the most expensive house prices compared to the others.
Added a comma for clarity and corrected the comparative structure.
RevisedConsequently, it experienced a small dip of about $40k before gradually increasing to its highest point at approximately $600k by the end of the period.
Improved sentence structure and clarity.
RevisedFirst, it increased gradually until 2005 before declining until 2008.
Replaced 'till' with 'until' for formality.

Lexical resource

Band 6.0/ 9

The vocabulary is adequate but lacks variety and precision.

Sentence revisions 3

RevisedThe line graph illustrates the average house prices in three different countries from 1997 to 2014.
Corrected the time period and improved word choice.
RevisedCountry A had the highest starting price.
Simplified the expression for clarity.
RevisedThe line for country B showed a more fluctuating pattern.
Improved word choice and grammatical structure.

Task achievement

Band 6.0/ 9

The essay addresses the task but lacks some details and accuracy.

Suggestions

Include more precise data from the graph.
Ensure all countries' trends are accurately described.

Check your own answer on this question

Write your answer and Axiom marks it the same way: a band for each criterion, and revisions for your own sentences. How the Task 1 checker works.

Check an essay free