Water use in six countries: IELTS Task 1 answer #3, band 7.0
A student’s answer to this repeated IELTS question, shared without their name and marked by Axiom on the four criteria. Select a highlighted passage to see how it could be revised, and why.
251 words. Marked by Axiom on 21 April 2025. Estimated by AI. It isn’t an official IELTS score.
The table this answer describes
| Domestic | Agricultural | Industrial | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Australia | 341 | 741 | 276 |
| Canada | 279 | 1,238 | 832 |
| China | 26 | 806 | 71 |
| Russia | 98 | 1,863 | 56 |
| Turkey | 80 | 1,482 | 731 |
| UK | 38 | 810 | 398 |
Academic Task 1251 words
The table gives information about water use in three sectors in six different countries.
The table illustrates the water usage based on three different categories — domestic water usage, agricultural water usage, and industrial water usage — witnessed in six different well-known countries.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedOverall, water usage for agricultural purposes is the most prevalent, with Russia at the top and Australia at the bottom.
The revised sentence is more concise and uses a wider range of vocabulary to express the same idea.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedThe industrial sector is the second significant consumer of water.
The revised sentence is grammatically correct and conveys the idea more clearly.
Grammar & accuracy
RevisedIn this sector, the highest and lowest figures are from Canada and Russia respectively.
The revised sentence is grammatically correct and uses the appropriate prepositions.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedIn the third category, Australia is the leading country and China is the least water-consuming country.
The revised sentence provides a clearer explanation and eliminates the awkward phrasing of the original sentence.
The Russian water usage figure is the highest — 1853 m³. Other three developed countries — Australia, China and UK — consume between 810 m³ and 741 m³ water.
Lexical resource
RevisedThe agricultural sector is the largest user of water.
The term 'largest user' is more appropriate in this context, as it conveys the idea of quantity more effectively.
Lexical resource
RevisedThere is a difference of around 250 m³ between the second and third places, with Turkey and Canada at 1482 m³ and 1238 m³ respectively.
The revised sentence is more natural and easier to understand.
Regardingly, Canadian industry sector is the most predominant with 832 m³ water usage, and Turkey is the second place with 731 m³. China and Russia consume 91 m³ and 56 m³ respectively, for the industry.
Lexical resource
RevisedThere is a disparity of about 120 m³ in the water consumption between Australia and the UK, with the latter being dominant.
The revised sentence corrects the awkward phrasing of the original sentence and uses more precise language.
When it comes to domestic water usage, Australia is the primary utilizer — 341 m³. The figure of Canada is 279 m³ and it holds the second place. Other four countries’ fraction account for under 98 m³ when China is the lowest.
Select a highlighted passage to see its suggested revision.
What Axiom wrote for each criterion: why the answer earned its band, and what to work on next.
Coherence & cohesion
Band 7.0/ 9
The essay is logically organized and presents a clear overview of the information. The use of cohesive devices is effective, and there is a good balance between the different sectors.
Suggestions
- Consider using a wider range of linking words and phrases to improve the flow of the essay.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedOverall, water usage for agricultural purposes is the most prevalent, with Russia at the top and Australia at the bottom.
The revised sentence is more concise and uses a wider range of vocabulary to express the same idea.
RevisedThe industrial sector is the second significant consumer of water.
The revised sentence is grammatically correct and conveys the idea more clearly.
RevisedIn the third category, Australia is the leading country and China is the least water-consuming country.
The revised sentence provides a clearer explanation and eliminates the awkward phrasing of the original sentence.
Grammar & accuracy
Band 7.0/ 9
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are only minor errors. However, there is room for improvement in terms of grammatical accuracy.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedIn this sector, the highest and lowest figures are from Canada and Russia respectively.
The revised sentence is grammatically correct and uses the appropriate prepositions.
RevisedThere is a disparity of about 120 m³ in the water usage between Australia and the UK, with the latter being dominant.
The revised sentence corrects the grammatical errors in the original sentence and uses more natural language.
RevisedThe water consumption of the other four countries is under 98 m³, with China being the least.
The revised sentence corrects the grammatical errors in the original sentence and uses more natural language.
Lexical resource
Band 7.0/ 9
The essay uses a good range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedThe agricultural sector is the largest user of water.
The term 'largest user' is more appropriate in this context, as it conveys the idea of quantity more effectively.
RevisedThere is a difference of around 250 m³ between the second and third places, with Turkey and Canada at 1482 m³ and 1238 m³ respectively.
The revised sentence is more natural and easier to understand.
RevisedThere is a disparity of about 120 m³ in the water consumption between Australia and the UK, with the latter being dominant.
The revised sentence corrects the awkward phrasing of the original sentence and uses more precise language.
Task achievement
Band 8.0/ 9
The essay addresses all parts of the task and presents a clear overview of the information. The essay also provides specific details to support the overview.
Suggestions
- The essay could be improved by providing more detailed comparisons and analysis of the data.
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