Participation in four sports: IELTS Task 1 answer #6, band 7.5
A student’s answer to this repeated IELTS question, shared without their name and marked by Axiom on the four criteria. Select a highlighted passage to see how it could be revised, and why.
182 words. Marked by Axiom on 16 October 2025. Estimated by AI. It isn’t an official IELTS score.
The line graph this answer describes
Show the data
| Basketball | Tennis | Badminton | Rugby | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1985 | 80 | 150 | 55 | 240 |
| 1990 | 78 | 175 | 45 | 210 |
| 1995 | 82 | 200 | 50 | 200 |
| 2000 | 83 | 210 | 50 | 150 |
| 2005 | 80 | 220 | 50 | 50 |
Academic Task 1182 words
The graph below shows the number of people taking part in four different kinds of sports in a particular region between 1985 and 2005.
The chart compares participation rates of various sports in a particular region from 1985 to 2005.
Overall, despite initial dominance, the number of rugby players fell significantly, eventually bottoming the chart and converging the count of badminton enthusiasts.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedAdditionally, while the figures for tennis increased sharply, taking the lead to become the most participated sport by 2005, those for basketballers remained almost unchanged throughout the period.
Clarifies progression and final comparison between tennis and basketball trends.
More specifically, looking at higher figures, rugby was the most participated sport in 1985, with around 240 participants. In contrast, the rate for tennis comprised approximately 150 enthusiasts in 1985, which is the second dominant indicator, over the next 2 decades their number constantly increased reaching their peak at around 230.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedNevertheless, by 2005, rugby had consistently lost attendees year after year, reaching its lowest point with about 50 participants.
Enhances clarity on the time progression and endpoint for rugby.
Turning to both the most stable and the least participated figures, basketball and badminton attracted around 75 and 55 participants in 1985. Since these sports did not gain the same interest among people as did tennis, they had almost the same number of practitioners in 2005, around 60 people took part in basketball and 50 in badminton.
Select a highlighted passage to see its suggested revision.
What Axiom wrote for each criterion: why the answer earned its band, and what to work on next.
Coherence & cohesion
Band 7.0/ 9
The essay is logically organized and ideas are well linked, although some details could be clearer.
Suggestions
- Provide more specific transitions between trends for sports.
- Ensure clear distinctions between different sports trends.
- Offer a brief concluding sentence to summarize main points.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedAdditionally, while the figures for tennis increased sharply, taking the lead to become the most participated sport by 2005, those for basketballers remained almost unchanged throughout the period.
Clarifies progression and final comparison between tennis and basketball trends.
RevisedNevertheless, by 2005, rugby had consistently lost attendees year after year, reaching its lowest point with about 50 participants.
Enhances clarity on the time progression and endpoint for rugby.
RevisedBy 2005, around 60 people were engaged in basketball whereas badminton saw a slight decline to about 50 participants.
Provides clearer comparison and highlights the change over time.
Grammar & accuracy
Band 8.0/ 9
The essay demonstrates a variety of grammatical structures with accuracy; minor errors exist.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedThe rate for tennis consisted of approximately 150 participants in 1985.
Corrects the incorrect use of 'comprised' in context.
RevisedThe participation numbers for basketball players remained relatively unchanged.
Aims for a more formal and accurate lexical choice.
RevisedSince these sports did not gain interest among the public as much as tennis did.
Improves sentence structure and coherence.
Lexical resource
Band 8.0/ 9
A good range of vocabulary is used effectively, though there could be more variety.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedThe graph delineates the participation trends among four distinct sports over two decades.
Uses more precise and varied vocabulary to enhance description.
RevisedRugby experienced a consistent decline in its number of participants.
Utilizes a more sophisticated expression to describe decline.
RevisedThese sports failed to capture increased interest over the years.
Involves a more precise phrase to reflect steady participation.
Task achievement
Band 8.0/ 9
Addresses all key features of the graph effectively with accurate comparisons and details.
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