Doctors’ pay in seven countries: IELTS Task 1 answer #3, band 6.0

The given bar chart compares the typical annual salary in US (thousands) of doctors and other workers in seven countries in the year, 2004.

Overall, what can be seen from the chart is that medical staff were paid annually higher than those of other employees in all seven countries. Also, it is clear that in two countries, including Canada and the US, doctors were paid most with US dominating.

In 2004, In the US doctors got paid much higher compared to other countries, which is 145 thousand, while the money that paid to other workers were nowhere near as doctors, which is accounting for just above the 40 thousands. In other three countries , Canada , Germany and Switzerland , annual salary of medical staff and other workers were relatively similar and were the countries that dominated after the US. In Germany, figures for the amount of salary of doctors were just above 110 thousands , for other workers, it represented much lower than other two countries which is 30 thousands, Whereas in Switzerland and Canada medical staff got between 100 and 110 thousands, while the salary of other workers were just above 40 thousands in Switzerland, 30 thousands in Canada respectively.

1. Coherence & cohesion

   Close revision note

   RevisedIn 2004, doctors in the US were paid significantly more than in other countries, with an average salary of 145 thousand. In contrast, the salary for other workers was much lower, at just above 40 thousand.

   The revised sentence provides the same information but is more concise and uses better sentence structure.

Regarding other three countries , France, Finland , Czech republic, in France doctors and other workers were paid the most among other two countries, representing around 82 and 30 thousands respectively. In Finland , the amount of money that paid to doctors and other workers were higher than those of Czech republic, with difference around 10 thousands from both categories.