International cooperation: IELTS Task 2 essay #1, band 7.0
A student’s answer to this repeated IELTS question, shared without their name and marked by Axiom on the four criteria. Select a highlighted passage to see how it could be revised, and why.
223 words. Marked by Axiom on 18 September 2026. Estimated by AI. It isn’t an official IELTS score.
Task 2223 words
Most of the urgent problems can only be solved with international cooperation. Do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, it is often argued that urgent problems can only be solved through international cooperation. I completely agree with this idea, as collaboration between countries can help governments to find more effective way to prevent it from becoming more dangerous.
For example, cybercrime has become a serious problem in many countries, with youngsters increasingly becoming victims of online fraud and losing their savings. To tackle this issue, governments need to cooperate in combating international cybercriminal networks and developing effective solutions.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedThe primary rationale for my agreement with this perspective is that international collaboration facilitates the sharing of threat information among countries, enabling them to take preemptive measures.
The revised sentence is more formal and academic in tone.
Lexical resource
RevisedCollaborative frameworks can enable countries to share intelligence, apprehend perpetrators, and safeguard citizens from harm.
The revised sentence uses more precise and effective vocabulary.
Therefore, governments should reach agreements and work closely with international partners. Instead of making war, countries should take part in diplomatic negotiations and find effective solutions. Furthermore, international partnership with governments can help to work together to prevent the upcoming conflicts.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedAdditionally, the magnitude and complexity of certain issues necessitate collaborative approaches, transcending the capabilities of individual nations.
The revision provides a more complex and formal sentence structure.
Lexical resource
RevisedFor instance, disputes between nations can escalate, inflicting substantial damage on both entities and their respective populations.
The revision provides a more precise and effective vocabulary.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedIn conclusion, I am of the firm belief that international cooperation is pivotal in addressing pressing global issues.
The revised sentence is more formal and academic in tone.
Lexical resource
RevisedBy fostering a culture of mutual information sharing, we can mitigate serious threats.
The revised sentence is more precise and effective.
Select a highlighted passage to see its suggested revision.
What Axiom wrote for each criterion: why the answer earned its band, and what to work on next.
Coherence & cohesion
Band 7.0/ 9
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved.
Suggestions
- Try to use a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas.
- Make sure that your conclusion effectively summarizes the points you have made in the essay.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedThe primary rationale for my agreement with this perspective is that international collaboration facilitates the sharing of threat information among countries, enabling them to take preemptive measures.
The revised sentence is more formal and academic in tone.
RevisedAdditionally, the magnitude and complexity of certain issues necessitate collaborative approaches, transcending the capabilities of individual nations.
The revision provides a more complex and formal sentence structure.
RevisedIn conclusion, I am of the firm belief that international cooperation is pivotal in addressing pressing global issues.
The revised sentence is more formal and academic in tone.
Grammar & accuracy
Band 7.0/ 9
The essay demonstrates a good control of a range of grammatical structures, with only minor errors. However, there are a few sentences that could be more clearly expressed.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedThe primary reason for my agreement with this perspective is that international collaboration facilitates the sharing of threat information among countries, enabling them to take preemptive measures.
The revised sentence is more clearly expressed.
RevisedAdditionally, the magnitude and complexity of certain issues require collaborative approaches, going beyond the capabilities of individual nations.
The revised sentence is more clearly expressed.
RevisedCollaborative frameworks can enable countries to share intelligence, and to apprehend perpetrators and safeguard citizens from harm.
The revised sentence is more clearly expressed.
Lexical resource
Band 7.0/ 9
The essay uses a good range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedCollaborative frameworks can enable countries to share intelligence, apprehend perpetrators, and safeguard citizens from harm.
The revised sentence uses more precise and effective vocabulary.
RevisedFor instance, disputes between nations can escalate, inflicting substantial damage on both entities and their respective populations.
The revision provides a more precise and effective vocabulary.
RevisedBy fostering a culture of mutual information sharing, we can mitigate serious threats.
The revised sentence is more precise and effective.
Task response
Band 7.0/ 9
The essay effectively addresses the task, providing a clear position throughout the response. The arguments are well-developed and supported with relevant examples. However, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the key points and restating the position.
Suggestions
- Consider revising the conclusion to more effectively summarize the key points and clearly restating your position.
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