Parents teaching children at home: IELTS Task 2 essay #2, band 7.5

The developments in the field of technology and education made it possible for the families in some countries to educate their children by themselves instead of going to schools. Even though it seems a better replacement to traditional schools, I believe, that the drawbacks of home schooling are far greater as it limits social development of child and there is no official accreditation for such education.

It's believed that schools can be a place where some young children develop social anxiety because of constant bullying by their peers. Research shows that young kids who were exposed to this behavior are prone to mental health issues in their adult lives. Moreover, those children will lose their confidence, as they chronically criticized for everything they did. To prevent such behavior, many parent started to educate their kids at home by themselves. The recent developments in the field of technology made home schooling easier, since they can find any needed subjects online and adjust them to their children.

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   RevisedIt is believed that schools can be a source of stress for some young children due to constant bullying by their peers.

   The revised sentence more accurately conveys the intended meaning.

Another benefit of home education is the foundation of stronger family bonds and values. Parents can pass on their own values, culture, language and religion. This, especially, matters if they don’t want their children to be influenced by society. Some parents’ beliefs may be conflicted by the school curriculum; thus, they often prefer to create their own curriculum and pick the subjects that they think are relevant to their kids. Additionally, when children are home educated, they spend more time with their parents which builds stronger bonds with them.

1. Coherence & cohesion

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   RevisedOn the other hand, home education can foster stronger family bonds and values.

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   RevisedThis is especially significant for parents who do not want their children to be overly influenced by society.

   The revised sentence is more clear and concise.

Despite those benefits, the disadvantages are more significant. One drawback of home schooling is limited social development. Child needs to interact with peers to develop social skills. Schools teach teamwork, conflict resolution, and communication through daily contact with classmates. Children who were taught at home may struggle in their workplaces in diverse societies in their adulthood. On top of that, it will be harder for them to accept the criticism and sharing with other people of different ages and backgrounds. This long-term weakness is hard to fix later.

1. Coherence & cohesion

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   RevisedHowever, the disadvantages are more significant.

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2. Grammar & accuracy

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   RevisedChildren need to interact with peers to develop social skills.

   The revised sentence corrects the singular/plural error.

The absence of official accreditation is another major disadvantage. Without any standardized exams or qualified assessments no college or university admissions can accept them. Those prospects may suffer in their career too, as most employers choose the ones who have a qualification for doing particular job. Furthermore, parents may lack knowledge at some subjects, few parents can teach chemistry, physics, advanced math and literature equally well. These gaps in the child’s knowledge may go unnoticed because no one else checks the standard. As a result, they grow up, not being equally great like their peers.

In conclusion, home education could be a better alternative for parents whose beliefs are not aligned with the system of schools and it guards little children from school violence and peer pressure, creating save atmosphere to study. However, disadvantages are far greater, since it limits social development of children and the limits of the parents’ knowledge can create gaps which can lead to poor academic performance.

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