Parents teaching children at home: IELTS Task 2 essay #1, band 8.0

While school might be a significant part of a child’s journey, some parents are in favor of teaching their children independently, not allowing them to take part in normal classes as their peers. Although this brings merits of safety matters and strengthened family bonds, the demerits of later poor decision-making skills and isolation takes precedence over its benefits.

1. Grammar & accuracy

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   RevisedAlthough this approach offers the benefits of increased safety and strengthened family bonds, the drawbacks of potential poor decision-making skills and isolation may outweigh the advantages.

   The revised sentence corrects the awkward phrasing and improves the clarity of the idea.

One of the advantages of being taught by parents is safety, with children getting education at home. Given home comfort, including enough facilities and snacks, might assist students in mood boost and probably an academic progress. For instance, children who get educated by their moms may be more dominant in terms of academic performance compared to their counterparts who commute to school to learn the same subjects. A further upside is a positive development in family relationships, which is timelessly crucial for both parents and children. When an 8-year-old boy learns something new from his father, for example, this does not only spark interest in the kid’s eyes but also increases his admiration for the dad. This, continuously happening might mean a gradually shaped father-boy closeness.

1. Lexical resource

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   RevisedProviding a comfortable home environment with adequate resources and snacks may enhance students' mood and potentially their academic progress.

   The revised sentence uses more precise and natural language to convey the same idea.

2. Lexical resource

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   RevisedThis ongoing dynamic could foster a stronger father-son relationship.

   The revised sentence uses more precise and natural language to convey the same idea.

Despite these positives, negatives of learning from parents are much greater. One major downside is its impact on decision-making skills, even though shaped later by children. To be more specific, children who study under parents’ teaching and supervision tend to be dependent on their educators in most cases. These kids might even try their best to avoid risks, not being able to leave their comfort zone. This usually starts with trivial matters, such as buying clothes, and can go on with later serious issues. Applying for a suitable university can be a precise example of how indecisive home-educated students might be when it is time to assume responsibility. An equally significant drawback is isolation. Kids getting used to tedious studying styles, without social interaction, might develop new habit of avoiding strangers. This is, undoubtedly, attributed to studying at home from an early age thanks to their parents. Lack of communication with people might compound children’s already uncomfortable life, leading to fear in public.

1. Coherence & cohesion

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   RevisedHowever, the disadvantages of learning from parents are much greater.

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2. Coherence & cohesion

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   RevisedOne major downside is its impact on children's decision-making skills.

   The revised sentence provides a clearer and more direct statement of the downside of learning from parents.

3. Grammar & accuracy

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   RevisedThese children may be more inclined to avoid risks, remaining within their comfort zone.

   The revised sentence corrects the awkward phrasing and improves the clarity of the idea.

4. Grammar & accuracy

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   RevisedThis tendency usually starts with trivial matters, such as making decisions about clothing, and can extend to more serious issues later on.

   The revised sentence corrects the awkward phrasing and improves the clarity of the idea.

5. Coherence & cohesion

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   RevisedAnother significant drawback is the potential for social isolation.

   The revised sentence provides a more detailed and specific statement of the drawback of isolation.

6. Lexical resource

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   RevisedChildren accustomed to the solitary, rigorous study style may develop a tendency to avoid social interactions.

   The revised sentence uses more precise and natural language to convey the same idea.

In conclusion, although the benefits of home-education conducted by parents are remarkable, bringing about safety and strengthened family relationships, the disadvantages such as isolation and lack of confidence in decision-making are more significant.