Letters, emails and social media: IELTS Task 2 essay #2, band 6.5
A student’s answer to this repeated IELTS question, shared without their name and marked by Axiom on the four criteria. Select a highlighted passage to see how it could be revised, and why.
273 words. Marked by Axiom on 11 September 2026. Estimated by AI. It isn’t an official IELTS score.
Task 2273 words
In the past, people used to write letters to communicate with friends and relatives, whereas today most people use emails and social media. Is this a positive or negative development?
Nowadays, people use email and social media for communication with others , but in the past people used to write letters. This essay will discuss both positive and negative sides of the development.
For example, one important benefit of using these platforms is the opportunity to share information with video ,picture or file and this is more effective than letters. Apart from the most cost-effective thing that people don’t need to go post office or buy stamps or envelopes. In addition on modern communication you can send to anywhere in the whole world by one click and the process takes a short time compared to letters which take several days.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedOne the one hand, the adoption of modern communication methods such as email and social media have introduced several advantages.
The revised sentence provides a smoother transition and more formal tone.
Secondly, privacy has become a serious issue, since personal information can be hacked, leaked, or shared without permission. These problems show that technology in communication is not always beneficial.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedOn the other hand, the use of modern communication tools has also led to some negative developments.
The revised sentence provides a clearer and more formal expression of the idea.
Grammar & accuracy
RevisedFirstly, they are often less personal, as handwritten letters tend to be more meaningful, whereas digital messages may appear short and impersonal.
The revised sentence corrects the use of the conjunction and provides a more formal expression of the idea.
Grammar & accuracy
RevisedFurthermore, the prevalence of abbreviations and informal language among many people may lead to a decline in writing skills, and young individuals might not engage in formal writing as much anymore.
The revised sentence provides a more formal and precise expression of the idea.
Lexical resource
RevisedLastly, social media, at times, diminishes face-to-face interactions, potentially weakening real-life relationships.
The revised sentence provides a more formal and precise expression of the idea.
Therefore, the positive impact of these tools is still very important in today’s world.
Coherence & cohesion
RevisedIn conclusion, despite the disadvantages of modern communication methods, it is evident that email and social media significantly simplify the process of connecting with others and sharing information.
The revised sentence provides a more formal and precise expression of the idea.
Select a highlighted passage to see its suggested revision.
What Axiom wrote for each criterion: why the answer earned its band, and what to work on next.
Coherence & cohesion
Band 6.0/ 9
The essay is logically organized and the ideas are connected, but there are some areas where the flow of ideas could be improved. The introduction and conclusion are clear and relevant, but the body paragraphs could be more detailed. Transitions between ideas are generally well-handled, but some sentences are slightly awkward. The essay is generally well-organized, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs that each discuss a different aspect of the topic, and a conclusion that restates the main points. However, there are some instances where the flow of ideas could be improved. For example, the transition between the positive and negative aspects of modern communication methods could be smoother.
Suggestions
- Provide more detailed explanations and examples in the body paragraphs.
- Improve the flow of ideas between sentences and paragraphs.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedOne the one hand, the adoption of modern communication methods such as email and social media have introduced several advantages.
The revised sentence provides a smoother transition and more formal tone.
RevisedOn the other hand, the use of modern communication tools has also led to some negative developments.
The revised sentence provides a clearer and more formal expression of the idea.
RevisedIn conclusion, despite the disadvantages of modern communication methods, it is evident that email and social media significantly simplify the process of connecting with others and sharing information.
The revised sentence provides a more formal and precise expression of the idea.
Grammar & accuracy
Band 7.0/ 9
The essay uses a variety of complex structures. However, there are a few grammatical errors and awkward constructions. The essay demonstrates a good command of a range of grammatical structures, with a variety of sentence types used effectively. However, there are some minor errors that could be revised for clarity. For example, in the sentence "apart from the most cost-effective thing that people don’t need to go post office or buy stamps or envelopes," the phrase "apart from the most cost-effective thing" is awkward and could be rephrased for clarity.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedFor instance, a significant advantage of these platforms is the ability to share information in various formats such as video, picture, or file, which is more effective than sending letters.
The revised sentence corrects the word order and provides a more formal expression of the idea.
RevisedFirstly, they are often less personal, as handwritten letters tend to be more meaningful, whereas digital messages may appear short and impersonal.
The revised sentence corrects the use of the conjunction and provides a more formal expression of the idea.
RevisedFurthermore, the prevalence of abbreviations and informal language among many people may lead to a decline in writing skills, and young individuals might not engage in formal writing as much anymore.
The revised sentence provides a more formal and precise expression of the idea.
Lexical resource
Band 7.0/ 9
The essay uses a variety of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good command of a range of vocabulary related to the topic, such as "communication tools," "privacy," and "writing skills." However, there are some instances of awkward or incorrect word choice that could be revised for clarity. For example, in the sentence "apart from the most cost-effective thing that people don’t need to go post office or buy stamps or envelopes," the phrase "apart from the most cost-effective thing" is awkward and could be rephrased for clarity.
Sentence revisions 3
RevisedOn the one hand, contemporary communication methods such as email and social media have introduced numerous benefits to our lives.
The revised sentence provides a more formal and precise word choice.
RevisedAdditionally, with modern communication, you can send messages to anywhere in the world with just a click, and the process is significantly faster than that of sending letters, which typically takes several days.
The revised sentence provides a more formal and precise expression of the idea.
RevisedLastly, social media, at times, diminishes face-to-face interactions, potentially weakening real-life relationships.
The revised sentence provides a more formal and precise expression of the idea.
Task response
Band 7.0/ 9
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing both the positive and negative aspects of the shift from writing letters to using email and social media for communication. The writer presents a clear position and supports it with relevant examples. However, the argument could be further developed in some areas. For example, the essay could provide more specific examples to support the claim that modern communication tools are less personal and intrusive.
Suggestions
- Provide more specific examples to support your arguments.
- Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea.
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